Blessed

I have been meaning to start writing a post about the last 16 weeks for awhile now, but I just kept feeling anxious. I imagine that anxiety will not be leaving me any time soon. I also had a secret blog regarding my fertility issues and that seemed to be a great outlet for me.

I guess I can start at the beginning and give a snippet of this journey that is far from being over….

2/1/15: Referred from my OBGYN to an RE(fertility specialist). Call to make an appointment and there is a 3 month waiting list since there is only one in our area.

3/16/15: 1st positive Pregnancy Test. Due Nov. 24th! 4 days before Heather’s wedding.

4/2/15: Everything looks fine on ultrasound, Collier asks for another HCG blood work one last time before Easter weekend since we planned on telling our families. Nurse says she wouldn’t bother, but does it to calm us down.

4/3/15: In the car picking Collier up from Gulfstream and we get a call from our doctor. Explains blood work didn’t come back well, and we will probably miscarry. She suggests I miscarry naturally since its my first. Collier and I decide we still want to go home. We drive for 30 minutes and I can’t do it. We turn around, unpack everything and I cuddle with Krypto for 48 hours. We go to the Easter Vigil Mass and I cry during the whole mass.

4/6/15: Collier is supposed to work the master’s and we didn’t want to have him cancel since we didn’t know exactly when I would miscarry. So he leaves to head to Augusta, 2 hours away.

4/7/15-4/10/15: Start to cramp a little, but nothing crazy. My mom was headed up to look at a house my sister and brother in law were going to buy, so they pick me up on the way to Charleston.

4/11/15: We tour their house on Saturday morning, and I can tell something isn’t right. I didn’t want anything to happen in their new house so my mom and I go to a fast food restaurant. I know right then I need to head home. My mom and I leave my dad and sister and head back to Bluffton to wait it out. I miscarry naturally.

4/12/15: Collier comes home from the Master’s. We spend some quality time over the next 2 weeks with Krypto, little did we know it would be our last 2 weeks.

5/3/15: It was a Sunday and we can tell Krypto is nearing the end of his long fight with cancer. We take him to the emergency vet. We hear that he needs a blood transfusion. We call his oncologist who is in a movie with his son, steps out and calls us right back. Talks us through it. We decide with our team of doctors its time. Krypto passes away after and 18+ month battle with lymphoma.

5/17/15: Collier heads to Geneva for work, and I book a spontaneous trip to go with him. We spend 2 weeks traveling Europe.

6/2/15: Meet with the RE and discuss our plan of attack. Get initial blood work taken. Blood work comes back a little abnormal, nurse thinks I may be pregnant….literally when I was implanting.

6/12/15: We find out we are pregnant again with another miracle! Blood work was good. no need to worry. Due Feb. 24th! Possibly a leap day baby!

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7/9/15: Find out at our 8 week ultrasound we would probably miscarry again. the day before I head to Jamaica for a wedding with my sister. Decide to go anyway since we probably wouldn’t miscarry that fast.

7/14/15: Go in for a d & c (RE requested this so that we can make sure it does not happen for a 3rd time to see if there was something wrong with me.) Collier is in Africa, so Heather comes with me. At the ultrasound before we head to the hospital to check in, the RE finds a very slow and small heart beat. Thinks I will still miscarry, but it is against his practice, so we hold out on moving forward. Call Collier while he is mid-flight over Africa somewhere, could barely hear him but I think he understood. Will do weekly appointments until there is no heartbeat.

7/20/15: Heather comes in town to spend her birthday with me since Zach was out of town, and Collier was still in Africa. Twin nephews are born!! Babies and mom are super healthy:) Lots of emotions. So thankful Heather spent her birthday with me, sad she had to miss out on the twins being born.

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7/21/15: Go in the next morning for a heartbeat check, there is no heart beat, we move forward with going to the hospital. Collier surprises me and tells me he is flying back and will be there, so Heather heads back to Charleston. I have the D & C and have no complications. I had a few nurses crying in the pre-op and post-op. It was a really weird day. I feel okay, we go for Tijuana flats for dinner and then I start to feel the pain. RE gave me no pain meds, so I tough it out:) I felt better about having some physical pain. I think it helped me cope.

until December 2015: We try naturally, we use clomid again with no positive outcome, I do a few invasive tests that shed some light, I go to grief counseling for the 3 babies I lost (including Krypto, of course), I focus on losing weight and getting healthy. I spoil Heather and focus on making her wedding festivities amazing! I truly think her wedding was the light that kept me going for those 3 months. I also started a new job in July of 2015, so I spent the fall focusing on the position and really pouring myself into my job. Probably an unhealthy amount.

December 2015: We move forward with superovulation therapy, which includes the daily shots. Body responds okay, not amazingly, and I end up with shingles at the age of 28. Start seeing an amazing chiropractor.

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January 2015: Took the month off from fertility meds since I had to take meds to get the shingles under control. Collier was travelling around the world as well.

February 2015: We took this month “off” because Collier would be in Singapore, little did we know another miracle was headed our way!

 

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